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Why “defragging” your mind is just so important…

May 9, 2011

A young man whose drugs were gadgets and computers, Craig suffered from low self-esteem. Recognising that his life was currently being affected by the past, I suggested we take the opportunity to reprogram his mind – rather like defragging a computer.

The subconscious mind maintains our body functions – and also stores the memories of everything that’s ever happened to us, together with the emotions we felt at the time.  While we can’t change what happened in the past, we can change how we feel about what happened. And as the subconscious mind tends not to distinguish between vivid imagination and reality, guided visualisation is very powerful. I knew therefore that Craig was an ideal candidate for my five-step Personal Enlightenment & Release (PEAR) Process.  

I asked Craig to imagine his dad in his mind’s eye. “Tell him – out loud – how you feel about your childhood.  Let him know how frightened you were of him…”

Once Craig had expressed all his hurt and anger, he was ready for stage two: forgiveness.  “Make the decision to forgive him – not because you condone his actions – but because your negative feelings are affecting you, not him. Forgiveness is your key to emotional freedom.”

Craig drew a deep breath, saying, “Dad, I forgive you for calling me a wimp. I forgive you for being proud of them and embarrassed about me.”  Tears tumbled down his cheeks. Gently, I led him to stage three.

“Tell your Dad that you choose to accept him as he is, even if never changes – for today, you’ve changed.”

Next was stage four. “Give your dad a big hug in your imagination – and tell him you love him.” More tears flowed.

“Finally, thank your father for listening and tell him it’s time for him to leave – and as he leaves the room, he closes the door.”

As our work together drew to a close, Craig slowly opened his eyes.  “I know it sounds crazy – but I feel so much lighter!” When we caught up a month later, Craig reported that he felt more confident and that the relationship with his father had slowly started to improve too.

You can try the “The PEAR Process” for yourself by using my CD. Visit the shop at for more details.

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